Early Morning Moments

I am in Indiana visiting my daughter and her husband and our little grandson, Jack.  I had the pleasure of staying with Jack all day yesterday while my daughter went to work.  It was a pleasant day, a flash-back to my days as a stay at home mom! I went for a walk with the baby and the dog, did some laundry, threw some dishes in the dishwasher, gave Jack a bath, clipped his fingernails, fed him some cereal and Cheerios, etc...quite a fun time!  It was fun, low-key and truly a peaceful, uncomplicated day for me.

This morning I woke up at 5:30 am to Jack crying in his bed.  I went in to check on him and met Michelle in the nursery.  She said she had just fed Jack and didn't know why he was fussy.  I picked him up and discovered he was all wet! I changed him and told Michelle to go back to bed.  I brought him back to bed with me!

It's funny how a baby is made to fit so nicely together with his grandmother. We snuggled together and he offered me his "paci" (pacifier).  He wiggled and kicked for about 20 minutes, but didn't cry at all.  Suddenly, Kozmo, the dog, jumped up on the bed with us and Jack had to sit up to see what the commotion was all about! He loves his "puppy"!  Finally, Jack began to relax and doze off.  Kozmo was snuggled up to my hip side and Jack was softly relaxing upon my arm on the other side.  I believe I was in "Grandma Heaven".

It was one of my very special "Sunflower moments"! I was holding my precious grandson, snuggling with the dog, watching the sun come up and in through the window and listening to the birds in the backyard.  I felt tears of joy and gratitude well up in my eyes and drip slowly down onto the pillow.  I was created for moments like these. Precious times that all too quickly pass unnoticed.  I noticed today and I am grateful for the experience.  

Thanks be to God for creating me for such moments of joy and bliss under His care.

Revelation

To Something...

"We will be guided into understanding what we need to do to take care of ourselves.  We will begin to trust our instincts, our feelings, our thoughts.

We will know when to go, to stop, to wait.  We will learn to great truth:

The plan will happen in spite of us, not because of us.

I pray today an each day that my thoughts, words and actions may be divinely led. I pray that I can move forward in confidence knowing my steps are guided."

-Melody Beattie The Language of Letting Go (2/11)

"Why are we terrified for God to speak to us?  Because we know that when God speaks we must either do what He asks or tell Him we will not obey." 

-Oswald Chambers My Utmost for His Highest (2/11)

Strangely, lately, the thought of a change has been filtering into my mind. I am confused by it.  This is especially true when it comes on the job front. I truly felt called to serve at Fox School, brought here out of the blue, fulfilling a life-long dream of mine to work in the public schools and to be a bilingual teacher.

As I pulled into the parking lot yesterday I was listening to a song by Third Day called "Revelation":

Give me a revelation,

Show me what to do

Cause I've been trying to find my way,

I haven't got a clue

Tell me should I stay here,

Or do I need to move

Give me a revelation

I've got nothing without You

I've got nothing without You

I'm not sure of the exact words, but as I got into the car at the end of the day, I heard the very same exact song again as I was pulling out...and it freaked me out.

Tell me should I stay here,

Or do I need to move?

I recall a foggy early morning drive in to the Fox School parking lot several years ago, when I was frustrated with the situation at Fox and I had asked about other positions in the district because I felt the pressure of the position. 

As I drove into the parking lot there was a certain glow around the gigantic pine tree in the driveway and the sun was shining through the fog onto that tree in such a beautiful way and I remember thinking, "This is a sign from God".

I stayed and weathered the trials and it has been good!  Now I am feeling those strange vibes of something calling me, a change, I need a revelation.

Give me a revelation

I've got nothing without You

I've got nothing without You

I move today with the certainty that my steps are Divinely guided!  I am listening! I just need to know if the call is truly from God.

And I wonder at how the "inkling" of change whispers to me in the words of a song and I wonder at how You, Lord, prepare me and get me ready for "real" change.  I felt that  "twinge" of discontent, heard a song, and have given myself an attitude adjustment.  My principal will leave at the end of this school year.

Tell me should I stay here

Or do I need to move?

Perhaps the change I felt was simply this. I still need the discernment and wisdom that only God can give me, help and love, I need patience for the transition, love for the kids, and stamina to keep learning and growing as a teacher!

"And the only way to live an undefeated life is to live looking to God"

-Oswald Chambers My Utmost for His Highest 3/6

So I go today and face You,

look to You,

and live

undefeated

unflapped by change

dedicated

full of Your spirit

in me

moving me

loving me!

I go, I do, but always,

like a sunflower,

face fixed on the sun

I turn

and look

 to YOU

the source

of all my 

strength,

energy

and 

POWER!

-Gail Mehlan 3/6/09